Category Archives Educational

Do Not Blame the Victim of a Bully

Bullying continues to be an undeniable problem in this country. Not only are adults dealing with it, we often have to help our own children through their own bullying ordeals. It truly can be a vicious cycle for many of us.

October is National Bullying Prevention month. This means that more attention is focused on this critical issue. We hear stories of kids of all ages being harassed in a myriad of ways. Why are they doing this? For many, it’s all about having power over another person.

What I would like to remind you this October is the following:

Never blame the victim of a bully

Yes, you read that right. As hard as it may be to believe, the victims of bullies may be blamed or shamed if they speak up. As if it isn’t hard enough to get the courage to say something, imagine another person pointing fingers at you for being intimidated and harassed by another individual. Like you had some kind of control of this matter.

Now, imagine what this would do to your self esteem. The person you trusted enough to talk to has turned the fault of the bullying on YOU.

NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!

This is not acceptable and must stop. There is never a reason why the person being bullied should feel as if they did something wrong. They are vulnerable enough and should have support. The victim needs other to stand by their side so they feel comfortable enough to use their voice to stop the vicious cycle.

It doesn’t matter how you define bullying or harassment. The fact is that when another person is being touched, bothered, verbally abused, or feel like they are not safe – something is wrong. Nobody should have to suck it up and deal. The reality is that the victim also has rights.

Both of my children have been bullied. It’s something we have had to deal with many times over the years. I am thankful that NHL and JSL have both been comfortable enough to tell us when this has happened. In addition to this, New York State has the Dignity for All Students Act (DASA) that grants rights to students that are bullied in school. This paragraph alone is extremely powerful:

New York State’s Dignity for All Students Act (The Dignity Act) seeks to provide the State’s public elementary and secondary school students with a safe and supportive environment free from discrimination, intimidation, taunting, harassment, and bullying on school property, a school bus and/or at a school function.

This is a great start, but a lot needs to be done in schools and throughout our society.

How do you help others when you see or know they are being bullied? If you have been the person bullied, what do you wish others had done to help you?

It's Me

Some of my previous posts about bullying:

Bullying posts by TechyDad: My Bullied History

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Opt-Out and Refuse Tests in 2016

Three years ago, there were rumblings about the New York State Grade 3-8 ELA and Math exams. As the parent of a fourth grader at the time, I listened to my son come home from school with hyper focus and worry about the tests. TechyDad and I did a lot of research and at almost the last minute, we made a BIG decision. Yes, we refused the NYS tests for our oldest son.

Public School Parent Advocacy

I have written about this topic numerous times over the last few years. As a teacher, I knew that these posts and my advocacy within the community could mean never teaching again. While it hurts to think of never being in a classroom again, my boys and their peers across NYS and the United States need people to speak out. We need to get the word out about the drastic changes in our schools. A generation of kids are being used to test educational practices thought up by people who do not have a background in teaching or child development. I can see drastic changes in the scope of learning between my seventh grader and third grader.

Being naïve, I thought that I would never be here refusing the 2016 tests for both of my kids. My heart was hopeful that by the time my youngest hit these tests that something would change. Much to my horror, little if anything has really changed. This is a fact that those with kids in schools know. Do not be fooled by the new Commissioner of Education in NYS, MaryEllen Elia, or the puppet master general, Governor Cuomo. The Common Core Task Force in NYS is a farce put together to pretend to listen and pacify angry parents.

Why to Refuse Tests in 2016

Pearson was fired by NYSED over the summer of 2015, but their test will be given this spring to those that do not refuse. In an attempt to quiet parents, Commissioner Elia has put no time limit on these developmentally inappropriate tests. Now kids can sit and feel like failures for an unlimited amount of time while they work on tests that many with advanced graduate degrees can not complete or make sense of.

Last year, approximately 250,000 kids across New York refused to take the grade 3-8 tests. Those in the advocacy networks are hopeful that half a million will refuse in 2016. The stakes are higher for many schools under the trapped Receivership System. If all refused these faulty tests the data could not be used against teachers and schools that are struggling with the reality of poverty and so much more.

So when will we opt back into the tests? Thanks to NYSAPE, this sums up most of my views pretty nicely.

When we will Opt In

I urge you to take the time and ask questions. Do not simply sit back and accept tests just because they are given. This is not about tests that or too hard and kids not being up to a challenge. This is about so much more and our children are the ones that will have to pay the ultimate price.

It's Me

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Tuesday Tales: Normal Norman

Could you demonstrate the word normal? When Sterling Children’s Books reached out about a book tackling what normal is, I knew that we had to review this book. That is the premise of Normal Norman by Tara Lazar. A young scientist narrates the book as she shares her presentation on what normal really means.

Normal Norman by Tara Lazar

Normal Norman – Written by Tara Lazar – Illustrated by S.britt

Published by Sterling Children’s Books ISBN 9781454913214 – $14.95 – Ages 4 and up

The narrator introduces us to Norman. Norman is an average animal. We see that he is an ape. As we continue along in the story, the narrator gets frustrated because Norman is not doing normal things. Norman has feelings and does not want to hurt a banana by peeling it. Of course, Norman tells the narrator this by talking. Apes do not normally speak English so that gets the readers attention.

The story continues as Norman shows ways that he is not normal. The beautiful illustrations by S.britt bring us into the different settings with Norman. We see his bed, family, friends, and more as they come alive in the perfectly drawn images.

Reading Normal Norman

In the end, we learn that normal is different for each of us. The lesson within the book is wonderful for kids of all ages and even a great reminder for adults. Within a classroom, this book could be used for chats about differences in all peers, accepting everyone for being unique, and embracing who you are compared to your classmates. Too many times, kids and adults think about societal norms. This way of thinking limits us and holds everyone back from being who we truly are.

This would make a perfect book for an elementary school teacher, library, or family of a child with special needs. I know as a parent of a child on the autism spectrum we often struggle with what people expect normal to look like. Way back, I tackled the word strange and wish a book like this was around. It’s taken us so many years and this book would have been wonderful to read when we first had the autism diagnosis. Normal Norman reminds us that everyone is their own normal and that’s all we want for our children.

Have you ever talked to your children about what normal is? I would love to know how you could use Normal Norman in your life. read any of The Night Before series? As always, Tuesday Tales is all about sharing our love of books. Please let me know what you have read recently. Link up to your book posts in the comments below. Include something you read on your own, with a child, or someone else. Also take some time to follow along on the Normal Norman blog tour. Below are the stops that will be celebrating the release of this new book.

It's Me

Disclosure: As noted above, I received this book from Sterling Publishing to review. No other compensation was received and all opinions are my own.

Normal Norman Blog Tour

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Books Your Kids Read in School

Do you know what books your children are reading in school? As a book nerd and teacher, I like to be aware of what my boys are reading. Both of them get excited when I am able to chat and ask them questions about the characters, plot, and beyond.

Books that kids read in school

When NHL started middle school last year, I tried to keep up with what he was reading. The last novel that they read in sixth grade was brutal. I will admit that I fell asleep several times and could not read it. The book was not one I would have selected, but apparently New York State had picked it for their EngageNY modules.

This year, I wanted to know when NHL started a book so I could keep up on what he’s learning in school. Thankfully, NHL mentioned to me several months ago that they started the first book for seventh grade ELA. I picked up a copy of the book. A Long Walk to Water by Linda Sue Park is another book that I may have skipped over. I try not to judge a book by its cover, but something else got me. I started to listen to the audio version of the book which is partially based on a true story. Within minutes, the audio included gun fire and kids racing from a war zone outside of their school.

I admit that I sent a text to TechyDad because I was floored with the book choice. A lot of questions went though my mind.

  • Why were they reading this book in seventh grade?
  • What is the connection with the curriculum?
  • Would the subject matter bother my son?
  • How would the kids react to the war and deaths associated with it?

I took a deep breath and waited to talk to NHL about the story. He was not far into the reading and told me generic things about Nya and Salva. He explained how one was a fictional girl and the other a real boy from Sudan. For those that are not familiar with the book, here is a brief synopsis via the author in the book trailer.

Rather than contact NHL’s teacher about the book, I posted on Facebook to my family and friends. I was curious if any people had read the book and if they knew why it may have been selected. This is when I was told more about Salva Dut and his connection to New York State (I had not gotten far enough in the book to make the connection to know this on my own). My friend is a teacher in the Buffalo area and she told me great things about the book. She explained that I needed to give it more time. I mentioned how I was listening to the audio and it had extra embellishments that made me question things more. I was happy to hear that most seventh graders do extremely well with the book and discussions. My choice in the audio book likely clouded my initial judgment. In addition to this, she told me about Salva Dut going to her school and an event that her students attended to learn about Water for South Sudan.

I finished reading A Long Walk to Water before NHL. Every few days, I would check in to see where they left off in school. I wanted to know if  they had talked about some deaths in the book. In addition to this, I was curious if they took more time to talk about the Sudanese “Lost Boys” that came to the United States. The connection to Rochester and New York State was big. Current events also could factor into this and I was curious if they talked about refugees that continue to come to our country from places like Sudan that are involved in war.

While I may have been concerned about the book at the start, I am glad that my initial feelings changed. A Long Walk to Water opened my eyes to the life of Salva Dut, the connection to refugees in New York State, and how teaching kids about this is important. While it may not have been my initial choice to read, I am happy that I read it along with my son to discuss the important topics that came up within it. Listening to Linda Sue Park’s recent TEDx talk has made me an even bigger fan of this talented author. This talk explains why A Long Walk to Water is so important for our children to read.

When I initially wrote this post, I had not seen the video above. It left me with goose bumps when you hear how much the young readers have raised for Water for South Sudan. This shows the power of a book that engages readers and makes them want to do more to assist others in need. As an educator and parent I am in awe of Linda Sue Park and thankful for the gift of her words in A Long Walk to Water. Now kids across the country can find the power to fight the worlds unfairness and so much more.

What books are your children reading in school and do you usually read them? As always, Tuesday Tales is all about sharing our love of books. What are you currently reading or what was the last book you read?

It's Me

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Hello From Our Cruise

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It’s hard to believe that our time on board the Norwegian Gem is almost over. There is so much to write about. For now, I will share some photos from our family travel.

The first day we spent time looking around the beautiful Gem.image

Thanks to Splash Academy, the kids liked to play and TechyDad and I had time to explore and relax alone.

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Our only excursion was to Kennedy Space Center. So amazing to see the history behind NASA.

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A day of sun, fun, and sand thanks to the private Bahamas island. The Great Stirrup Cay was gorgeous. I wanted to take home my own palm tree.imageimageimageimage

The next day we explored Nassau, Bahamas on our own.

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So much more to share, but first I must enjoy the rest of the cruise with my family.

It's Me

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